I'm Still Here

I've been golfing a lot. I had a tournament yesterday (got 2nd overall) and have one next Monday...then the 26th and 27th of June is like the Women's City Tournament. Individual play. DH is my caddie on day 2. I hope to be in the top 10. That'd be nice.

DH and I were golfing on Saturday, just the 2 of us. We got in a stupid fight and I started crying, pretty hard. Choked on my iced tea. I guess that holding back all the pain and tears from all of this can hit at crazy times I guess. I've also been really b*tchy lately. That's not like me. I don't know if suddenly, 4 1/2 weeks post-d&c, hormones are screwing with me. But I'm pretty out of it these days.

I am a nut so I'm planning on seeing if our +OPK trysts worked by testing this upcoming weekend. Yeah, well I need something to look forward too. AF or a BFP are both fine with me. AF means we can move on.

I got the results from my chromosomal tests today - NORMAL. DH's are due in a couple days. At least its not me. I'd feel awful if DH had something wrong, but I'd like to know if that's the reason for RPL. If his test is normal, we'll go ahead with 1-2 more (DH wants 3 more) Injectable IUI cycles. Can you imagine? 10 IUIs?

We found some mini/micro-IVF in Madison. I'm following one blogger (makingmemom.blogspot.com) using this method; unfortunately, for some crazy reason it's not working for her (yet, b/c I think it will). The price is right...any thoughts on this?

3 of my co-workers are expecting. Due in September, October and November. I was the fourth one who was pregnant and would have been due in December. I have to see their growing bellies every day. Only 35 people in the office. The three of them work several feet from my desk. Some days, I'm fine. Others, it's tough. I just hope I don't start having crying jags. I would have been 12 weeks this Thursday.

Is it just me, or are most of the bloggers I'm following pregnant now? It's not fair, it seems, that I've been pregnant before them and they had to read about my pregnancies. Sad though, how the tide turned after my most recent loss. BFPs everywhere. 

With my luck, we'd get pregnant during our "break" and lose that one too. This sucks.